“I’m
not wise, but the beginning of wisdom is there; it’s like relaxing into —and an
acceptance of—things.” ~Tina
Turner
Think about standing under a waterfall. Feel the power of the water hitting your
body. Now picture yourself attempting to
hold that water back. Stop the water
from flowing over the rocks. You
fiercely and intensely use all of your power and strength to prevent the water
from touching the rock or yourself. You
engage yourself in a task that has no payoff. You work to
achieve a goal that is unachievable. In
that attempt, you create in yourself physical (pain of the attempt),
psychological (belief about the attempt) and emotional (feelings of the
attempt) exhaustion.
Now picture yourself standing under the same waterfall and
allowing the water to do what it does. There
is awareness that you are interrupting the flow of the water but not stopping
it. You can sense the water, feel the water and know what the water’s intention is. And because you accept it, you do not
resist. Ahhh … relief.
At any given moment you can
accept what is. It is a choice. It becomes a choice the minute there is
conflict and pain. It is then that you
have awareness—your mind, your body and/or your spirit is speaking to you. It’s a choice to listen.
So what is it that you need
to accept? It could be his pathology, or
the pain that it has/is causing. It
could be accepting that because he is your child(ren)’s father, the contact
will never end (so you’d better learn how to disengage), or accepting that each
time you have to see him, or hear about him, it will be a challenge. Maybe you need to accept that you have been
negatively impacted by the relationship; that what is happening to you, your
changes in behavior, or mood, or thinking, are PTSD and not you being crazy. And it might just be that you accept who he
is and accept the consequences of who he is but the gift of acceptance needs to
be given to you. Is it in accepting that
you are a good, whole person filled with love, compassion and honesty who needs
to accept that something bad happened to
you and not because of you?
Whatever IT is or wherever the acceptance is needed, I
beg you to release yourself from it. In
accepting there is freedom. I offer this
blessing for acceptance to you:
Turn your face to the sun and accept the warmth.
Release your own resistance to what is.
You are worth the peace that comes.
There is value in you and all that you know.
Blessings to you for freedom through your acceptance.